Saturday, September 4, 2010

Gathering my thoughts as I sit here in front of my laptop there are a few to choose from.
None are very pretty.
You see, I think I am pouting. It seems fitting since I am studying Jonah at the moment. He was a great pouter.
I, of course, am nothing like him! Or so I would like to think...

Jonah was a selfish man. There he was asleep on this boat that was literally under attack. The attack came in the form of a storm, a God-sent storm. A storm to get Jonah's attention.
It got everyone else's attention on board that boat, just not Jonah's. He was trying to ignore the whole thing. He was running from his God.
Did he care if everyone else suffered and maybe even lost their lives? It certainly didn't seem so. Once the fact that Jonah was the reason for this storm was revealed and he admitted it he did nothing to help them. If they wanted to they could toss him overboard, but if they couldn't bring themselves to do so he wasn't going to do it for them.
They agonized and prayed and finally realized that there was no other choice, so over the side went Jonah!

How am I like Jonah?
Am I running from my God? Oh no! I am clinging to Him, leaning on Him, walking as closely as possible with Him and at times dancing with Him. As a matter of fact, this morning we indulged in one of those dances.

Yet, on the turn of a one little moment I went from feeling light-hearted to something very other.
I would have to say that I am feeling sorry for myself right now. That has tinges of selfishness to it.

I am bored and lonely.
It is just Ray and I home alone with no where to go and nothing to do.
My poor honey cannot see well enough to do much of anything. It is very tiring for him to concentrate on anything visually. So he isn't interested in playing any games.
Where could we go that he would not find too draining? No where.

The realization that it is indeed Labor Day weekend hit me. One of the weekends where most people are getting together with family or friends.
During our summers we have always held a number of picnics. Not this summer.
Labor Day marks the end of the season for such celebrations.

Stopping to think beyond myself I know that Ray too is feeling this dramatic change in our lives. I, at least, am unhindered physically and mentally. He is so dependent, which is very contrary to his nature!

So what is the solution to this place I and my dear husband find ourselves in?
Just like Jonah - surrender. Surrender to the LORD. To do so sets us free.

Each night we pray together and each night we surrender it all, once more, to our Gracious God. I think I will go do just that right now.

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