Friday, June 13, 2014

Tears for a Father

Tears quickly filled my eyes as I listened to the commentator's remarks. 
As usual, I was listening to "The World and Everything in it", which is produced by World News Group.

 Monday through Friday, as I settle myself in my little Subby, Pearly and prepare to drive my honey to the "Y", I click on their latest podcast.
Today's had a segment on Fathers' Day.

The speaker spoke of his father and how the man always had time for his kids, even though he held down two jobs.  His dad would play games with them and give his undivided attention.  At this father's grave site a few years ago his daughter summed his life up with this comment:  "He was a good man."
What a wonderful thing to be able to say, in all sincerity, about one's father!

As I mark more years on this planet I tend to be moved to tears more easily.  A simple headline can do it at times.  Yet, I have been especially sensitive regarding the topic of fathers for years prior this increasing sensitivity.

I recall watching a MacDonalds'' commercial years ago that opened the flood gates.  It was a little girl with her daddy on a father/daughter date at said fast food place.  I was mesmerized, but what truly moved me was when she climbed up into her daddy's welcoming lap.
How I wept for what I would never experience. 

I never knew my father.  To be truthful I am not 100 percent certain who he is/was.
The first father image in my life, thankfully, was my maternal grandfather.  I had him full time for the first three or so years of my life.  He loved me.
Then my mother married and we moved away.
By the time I was five my grandfather had passed away.

My step-father was a very conflicted man over many things, but one of the major issues concerned women.  This terribly damaged man was ill-equipped to father anyone, especially daughters.  (He and my mother went on to have three more girls.)

Many of the issues that I have struggled over in the past stem from the longing for not only a father, but a daddy.  Truly that was my heart's cry.

I remember seeing a plaque at my cousin's home that read something like this, "Anyone can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a daddy."

Today many are fathering children and then moving on without so much as a backward glance.
I meet many such abandoned grown children regularly.
We often connect because of this shared loss.

After I encountered Jesus and fell in love with Him the way was opened up to me to get to know my Heavenly Father.
In time I came to learn that His love was unconditional and that I had His undivided attention.

Never will I forget the day He told me that, not only had He adopted me, but I could call Him "Abba", which means daddy or papa.
As anyone who has read my musings in the past can attest I have settled very comfortably on the Name Papa!
The Words that spoke to my heart are found in Romans eight, verse fifteen.  They read,as follows, in the Amplified Version:
"For the Spirit which you have now received is not a spirit of slavery to put you once more in bondage to fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption (the Spirit producing sonship) in the bliss of which we cry, Abba ! Father!"
Fear is what I wore as a cloak.
Now I am covered by His wings instead!

So why am I still moved to tears in longing for an earthly father?
Simply because this life is a journey where we experience more and more healing as we learn to lean on Papa more fully.
We do not arrive on this side of glory, but a day is coming when...
"He shall wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away."
Meanwhile, I can climb up into Papa's lap anytime I need to, as His arms are always open in welcome!