Blessings

"All God is, He is abundantly.  All God gives, He gives abundantly.  He loves to bless!"

Where did this quote come from?  My journal.  It is one of the comments I had written down this morning.

It is a joy to have such a big God.  A joy that offers peace in all circumstances.
Today's circumstances made it easy to enjoy that joy and peace.

Beautiful weather was a perfect backdrop for a lovely day enjoying family. 
A day where Ray and I could be present for our grandson, Levi's graduation. 
A day overflowing with abundant blessings!
A day where I could hold our great-grand baby, Ariana all I wanted!  What a treasure!!
A day where we could relax.
A day to simply enjoy.

Back in our hotel room I thought I would download all the wonderful pictures from today.  Armed with happy pictures I thought I'd share a few on Facebook.  After which I wanted to check my email and stop in here for a short posting.
I realized that I am spoiled.  That realization came as I found myself tapping my fingers impatiently while waiting for my laptop to connect with the Internet.  The connection is v-e-r-r-r-y s-l-o-o-o-w!
Trying to download a few pictures was just that - trying!  The process was painfully slow and I decided two pictures were plenty for the time being.
I gave up on the idea of checking my email and after numerous tries actually made it to this site.

All of this is really very small potatoes in the grand scheme of things.  In light of the wonderful day I just experienced it is even smaller.
Yet...
I struggled with impatience and irritation.
Spoiled, spoiled, spoiled!!
Oh the things we take for granted!

As I was grumbling over having to deal with such slow Internet service another comment from this morning's journal entries came to mind.

"My God is not finished with me yet, not until we are face-to-face."

He uses everything for blessing in our lives.  This evening He used a slow Internet connection to do a little more work in my heart. 
Isn't it interesting that it is the little things in life that can trip us up so easily?
I am so glad that my God is not only not finished with me yet, but never gives up on me.  Neither the little things nor the big trip Him up!  Knowing that gives me joy and peace.

Thoughts to Carry Us Through

"Prayer is not an exercise, it is the life."  Oswald Chambers.

That is the first thing that Papa spoke to me this morning.
Ray and I are heading out on our trip to West Virginia, by way of Pennsylvania shortly.  I had no intention of posting to this blog this morning, but feel compelled to do so.

There are many concerns on my heart this morning.
A friend who is struggling with her relationship with our Papa.
One of my closest friends, a kindred-heart is dealing with one heal issue after another.
Our grandson has declared himself an atheist on Face Book; coupled with that he is romanticizing the drug scene.  Goes hand-in-hand, doesn't it....
My sister, Chris' grief is as fresh as ever.

Those are just the top four that are breaking my heart at the moment.

Papa spoke again.

"The LORD is near to the brokenhearted...."  Psalm Thirty-four, the beginning of verse eighteen.

I have peace.   The Heart of my God breaks with me.  Yet, He is not wringing His Hands, but reaching out to touch each heart. 

His Word encourages me, as it is meant to do.

"For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope."  Romans Fifteen, verse four.

I have hope.

In David Jeremiah's "Sanctuary" he spoke of meekness.  As I read his words, a fresh definition came to me.  Meekness means there is no need to scrap over the things of life.  I do not need to wring my hands, because it is all in the hands of my loving Papa!

I will continue to "pray without ceasing."  Prayer is the life.  Prayer is a continual conversation with the One who is always listening and answering.  He answers every prayer, in His time and in His perfect way.
To His Be All the Glory!!

Along the Dusty Path of Life

A few people have commented that I do not do many updates of my honey's condition these days.  That is because quite a bit less is happening now.   The latest is that recently he has been experiencing more pain.  It appears that his body has gotten accustomed to the meds that were prescribed for the pain. 

More pain causes him to do less.

Today I tried to encourage him to do a few things in hopes that it would distract him from the pain.  There is more pain when he thinks about it, but that isn't anything new.  A wince crosses his face whenever someone asks about his arm.  I doubt anything can be done about that particular cause and effect.

Last week, I believe, that I mentioned my latest reads.  I finished "Street Wise," by John Goodfellow.  It is always a joy to learn of how God has transformed yet another life, which He did for John.  The man went from an aimless life of petty crime, bar fights, illicit sex, et cetera that was filled with anger and discord to a life of joy and purpose.

A trip to the library today found two books on CD that will help Ray and I pass our time as we travel to West Virginia this Thursday.  "Oliver Twist" is one selection, as I cannot get enough of Dickens!  (this wouldn't be a Ray choice, but he sleeps through most traveling and the driver must be kept occupied!)The other is something written by James Patterson.  I have never read anything by him, but did recall that my niece, Sara loved his books, so I thought I'd see what he was all about.  I know her cousin, Sean, who is an avid reader, has done the same thing, which is where the thought originated.  We will have to compare notes!

As far as the purpose for the trip, our grandson, Levi is graduating from high school this coming Saturday and we do not want to miss it!  It is also a wonderful opportunity to spend time with all the family, especially our granddaughter, Jasmine and our great-granddaughter, Ariana!!

Now a little something about Papa.
I love when I sense His Presence; at times He overwhelms me and delights me beyond description.  At other times I sense nothing.   Kind of a mountain top experience verses the normal dusty path of everyday stuff.

This faith walk is definitely not about sight.
Yet, even when I do not sense His Presence there is plenty of evidence that He is still with me.
He answers my prayers (!) and in ways that there is no doubt that it was Him at work.  I am always amazed that He pays such close attention to my concerns, both small and huge!

My dear daughter-in-law started a new job a while back, which worked for her in most ways.  However there was one primary person who was miserable, very disrespectful and arrogant  Others told her that this particular person was always like this and many had left because of the situation.
I asked Papa to give him some attention.
Things got worse and Mindy gave her notice.
It seems that this did the trick.  A hard heart was softened and wonder of wonders a dramatic change has taken place!  Mindy is now staying right where she is.

That is just one example and I am sure that some could just write it off to coincidence.  Not me.  I know my Papa.  Anyway there are more examples than I have time to list here.

Walking with Papa is just that.  He is beside me, not up in the heavens looking down on me.  Though He is there too.
My favorite commentator, Jill Carattini recently wrote of a grief that she had experienced.  At the time she wondered where God was, as it seemed that His Throne was empty.  Then she realized,

"The Throne was empty because the One who fills it had stepped down to sit beside us as we cried."

What a gift! 

My Bible study group looked at the name that is often used for our God, "The Living God.'  He is alive in ways that we cannot even imagine.  He is always active, moving, flowing, vibrant; the Living God is everywhere.  This means that each one of us can connect with Him and invite Him to join us in every detail of our lives.  When He is in it we experience life that is truly living!

Conversations within the Community

"Pray your way through the day."  Dr. Robert Cook

Dr. Cook was one of the first teachers that I heard on the radio, as I sought to learn more about the Savior who had drawn me to Himself.  The man is one of my all-time favorites.  He sounds so kind and caring and his teaching is very practical and down-to-earth.  I refer to him as my "spiritual father," as I have learned so much from him.   I look forward to meeting him in glory, which is where he is.

Prayer was something he spoke of during every broadcast.  He admonished his listeners to pray over everything; before answering the phone, rising from bed, beginning a conversation, shopping, everything!  That means we have a continual conversation going on with our heavenly Father.
For a long time I would practice putting his advice into action.  After a time it became second-nature.

These days I have a hard time telling whether I am always praying or simply assuming Papa will guide in each detail.  I am His and am certain that He is leading, but I want to become more aware again of relying upon Him.  So I am going to begin once more with the basics and deliberately pray over all the details of my day.  
I want to be reminded more of the spiritual versus the material world.  I am part of a heavenly community and want to live accordingly.  This morning Jill Carattini made a comment in her contribution to "Slice of Infinity." 

"The very community we long for is governed by the One who longs for us to be in it."

A good reminder than Papa wants me (us) to be fully in His Kingdom, not just hovering around the perimeter, as community reflects interaction, not just observation.

Papa gave me this cool picture this morning, as I read a few verses in Hebrews Six, verses eighteen and nineteen.  They tell us that hope is set before us and it is both sure and steadfast.  This reminded me that Jesus had something set before Him which is why He endured the Cross.  It was joy.
Hope that is certain of what our future holds because of what Jesus did for us.  Joy that He would open the way for relationship with us through His death.
The picture formed of His joy calling to our hope and both being drawn to one another.  Drawn together until they were intertwined in a way that is inseparable!  The Master Weaver weaves us into the fabric of His of His community, which is His Kingdom, with joy!

To fully enjoy community we need to take part in it.  That includes good, deep conversations.  With our God that means prayer. 
When I see Him, I want to recognize His Face and His Voice.

According to some the end is coming this weekend, which means I would be seeing Him very soon.  I take no stock in what they say.  Jesus said that NO ONE knows the day or the hour, but the Father. 

I do know that He could return at any moment.  We are told to be ready.  Whether it is this weekend or in a thousand years, I want to and need to live as if it were today.
So I will continue my conversation with my Papa in confidence that He, indeed, has everything in hand!

Gratitude List

The heavy heart has a way of taking center stage in a life.  If it is allowed to stay there, all else will grow very dim.  The remedy is to deliberately put it in its place.
For me there are two steps involved:  Talk to Papa and then make a gratitude list.

As I bring my burdens to Him I visualize handing them over, one-by-one.  I thank Him for His willingness, power and ability to handle all of it.
Once I have surrendered it to my God I need to fill the void.  In other words I need to focus my thoughts elsewhere.  Otherwise, I can easily take it all back again!

Here's my list from just one day.  Today.

I am grateful that I woke up this morning...

And that...

my God was there to greet me...give me all His attention...speak with me...listen to me...

I could open His Word...it is truly living...anointed by His Spirit...

I am healthy...as well as my family...

the beauty of creation is mine to enjoy...the chorus of birds greeting the early morning...the beauty of our yard being drawn out by the gifted hand of Matthew, our resident arborist...

I am almost done with spring cleaning :)...

I have a home to clean...

texting allows me to connect with a few of my loved ones more often than we would ever talk on a phone or see one another face-to-face...

Roo, our very affectionate, playful kitten...

a loving family....

sharing my home (and kitchen) with another woman and enjoying it...

a friend, who happens to be a plumber, who blessed us in a big way...

finding a hair stylist who listened to me (!)...

laughter around the dinner table...

the opportunity to address my most recent deep hurt and seeing a door to healing open...(I believe my choosing to be grateful opened the door to this opportunity)

we subscribe to Netflix...
       
tonight I was able to watch a documentary on Fanny Crosby....

I love the words to so many of her hymns.  As I thought of some of them, it occurred to me that I could use the titles to add to my gratitude list!

Blessed Assurance (Jesus is mine!)...
Jesus Loves Even Me...
All the Way my Savior Leads Me...
He Hideth My Soul...
Redeemed (How I love to proclaim it!)...
Saved by Grace...

These truths alone are enough to fill that gratitude list!

Popped Balloons

It feels like it is time to break the silence.
What do You want me to share here, Papa?
The past few days I have felt deflated.  If I were a balloon, I would have not only lost all my air, but there would be a tear across my surface.  A jagged tear.

This is not the first time that I have been blindsided.  It is not the first time that I have been sent sprawling and ended up flat on my face with no energy to pick myself up again.
I have been stunned into silence.  You, Dearest Papa, have taught me how to be silent.
You have taught me to cry out for You to "set a guard upon my lips, O LORD."
I know to speak out of hurt and pain is unwise.  I will continue to wait until You give me the right words.  You are the Master Wordsmith.

As I have been sorting through my feelings, You have spoken into my pain and sense of betrayal.
Truly You have responded to my every cry.
Going through my every day I have tried to do what is right and kind and good.  You know that I have fallen short over and over, yet You have blessed my efforts and I am grateful.

Human nature, generally, does not care about my efforts, nor my feelings, but is out for itself.  As that thought crossed my mind and I visited with it for a little while I thought how I had been betrayed.  As I had reached out to do good, it seems it was received with a false smile more often than I care to know. 
At this point You, my tender Papa, whispered to me, "Who do you do all of this for?"
I was reminded that it is for You alone that I desire to do anything.  You and I both know that it is not with a pure motive, but we are working on that problem.  Knowing that all I commit to You and desire to honor You with is never wasted is a comfort.  This truth lifts my heart and spirit.  I find that the tear is not so ragged and that a nail-scarred Hand is tenderly covering my wound.

When pain comes, when sorrow comes, when we feel left high and dry...He is there...He is here!
My God is present.  He is never away or at a distance.   When I look up I always find Him.  And His Presence changes everything.  I read a comment by Max Lucado this morning.  He said,

"There is never a non-sacred moment." 

Where God is it is sacred.  He is here!  I can expect Him to redeem every moment.  After all, He is the Redeemer.
Max also reminded me that my LORD is in it with me.  No matter what "it" is.

Yesterday evening my Bible study group was studying another name of God.  It was "The Lion of Judah."
In scripture it also refers to the enemy as one who

"prowls about like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." 

As I prayed, Papa gave me a picture.  In comparison to the Lion of Judah he is a housecat that has been declawed and defanged!!

Today I began to prepare the study for next Monday.  It is my turn to lead.   The study's focus is on the name "Living God."
As I worked my way through different passages I was impressed with all the evidence that He is living. Deuteronomy Five finds people trembling because they heard His voice.
In Psalm Forty-two He commands, sings and helps His people.  None of which can be done by one who is dead.
Jeremiah Ten draws a great picture.  The prophet compares idols to God.  The idols are made by man's hands and must be carried around.  They are blind and deaf.  Our God was not created by anyone, but does the creating.  He is the LORD of hosts.  That means He leads one huge army!

I still hurt.  I still need to address that hurt.  But I am comforted by the God of comfort.  He is living; He is mighty, He is my God, and He is with me!

Seeing the Blessings

The topic of light and gladness is still rattling around in my head.  I looked up Psalm ninety-seven in my Amplified Bible.  This version gives the full meaning of the words.  Verse eleven expanded the picture I had in my mind.

"Light is sown for the (uncomromisingly) righteous and strewn along their pathway, and for the upright in heart (the irrepressible joy which comes from consciousness of His favor and protection)."

I know that I have shared the vision God gave someone for me.  They saw me stopping along a path to pick up all the treasures Papa had placed there for me.  He has treasures for each one of us.  The key to discovering them is given us in the above verse.
Be aware of being in His favor and protection.  He has promised this for His children and He keeps His promises.  As we receive this truth for ourselves, our eyes will be more attuned to seeing the blessings of light, which will bring gladness to our hearts.

Those blessings come in all forms.

Light, happy moments....
The other day Mindy was driving home and her eye was caught by something lying on the road.  It had the same coloring as my cat, Chloe.  She couldn't bear to look too closely, but came home and got Matt to go back with her.  Mindy was so concerned about having to tell me that my cat had been killed.  I am sure that she was remembering the pain of losing their Sophie last fall.
When they returned I asked what was going on.  I sensed something was afoot.
Mindy told me the story and how they had discovered that it was just an old piece of rug!
Matt's comment was that it was sad, as it had been a faithful old rug...

The light and gladness in this story is obvious: Mindy's concern, Matt's humor and the fact that it wasn't my cat!

Today light and gladness came wrapped in heavier material.  I received a piece of mail from my sister Chrissy today.  She had sent me an article that a couple of Sara's friends and coworkers had written about her.  It made me cry.
Grief has a way of surprising me.  I will always miss my niece, but thought the grief had subsided.  Not so and maybe never so.
As I read the article grief's wound opened itself up again.  It all came back to me and felt so fresh.

Where was the light and gladness in this moment?  It came as Papa helped me to reflect on the blessing of having had Sara in my life and the joy of knowing that she had touched so many lives.  Knowing that my God is love and was present through all Sara faced, including death and eternity, I can count it all joy.

This morning I was reminded that each one of us is very precious to our God.   He cares for all His creation and even pays attention when a sparrow falls to the ground.  In Matthew account of Jesus' teaching we are reminded that we are of much greater value than that little bird.
That is true light and brings me a whole lot of gladness!!