Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Out of Sorts

How long does it take for a lesson to sink in?

We have all been there.

Plans are made.
Some without much forethought
Others are deliberately laid out.
Either way we expect to see them come to pass.

Then life intersects with our cherished expectations.

At which time we face a choice; resistance or acceptance.

Faith and flexibility are the keys to responding with the latter.

Faith says there is One who is directing our life and who also knows what He is doing.

Flexibility is evidence of that faith.

Papa has been teaching me to hold my plans loosely with a willingness to let them go without a fight..

I thought I was doing pretty well with this particular course.  The problem is that there are many levels involved to truly learn a subject.
It seems that I had been on a possible 201 course level and it was now time to move me up to the next level.  What would that be?  301?

We arrived in Florida for our yearly visit with Ray’s mom.  Each visit has revealed changes, but none as dramatic as this one’s.

In preparing for this trip I packed the essentials: my Bible, my lap top and my gym clothes.

The gym clothes have laid in the drawer in which they were placed when I unpacked.  It has been eleven days since I last exercised.  Sigh.

My trusty laptop has seen occasional, brief activity.

Far from the hours of word processing that I anticipated.

I have a talk to prepare.  It needs to get out of my head and heart and onto paper soon!  I thought I would have a good amount of leisure time in which to do so.  Sigh.

Only my Bible has consistently seen the light of day, but, oh, how I have longed to bathe leisurely in its Light, but that has not been possible.  Sigh.

For the first few days I was anything but flexible. 

Nothing was going as anticipated.
After two days with Mom, we piled into her car and drove across the state to visit her cousin.  Both of these precious women take much more energy and attention these days.
My head was spinning and I was definitely out of sorts.

By the way, do you know what the term “out of sorts” means?

Sorts were the pieces of type printers needed to make up a font in the age when it was all done by hand, one letter at a time.  Without the sorts they could not work steadily, which meant less pay, as they were paid by the amount of type they set, not the amount of time they worked.
Being out of sorts left them a bit ill of ease.

I was ill at ease.

Until Jesus helped me realize what had been happening.

The thought came to me that I was "kicking against the goads."

What does that mean?

In the Twenty-Sixth chapter of ACTS the Apostle Paul was relating his encounter with Jesus.  Basically the LORD told Paul that he had been "kicking against the goads."

Goads were used to prod cattle and livestock forward, and they would frequently kick back at them, only causing themselves more injury. The thought is that Paul had been kicking against God's "goading," and God had been trying to urge him to go in a certain direction.

That is what I had been doing.  Fighting God's leading.
Besides wanting to stick to my own agenda I do believe I was struggling with being a "caregiver" to three at once.  Not a welcome, nor easy role.
Once I recognized what was going on all necessary sorts were found to be in supply in abundance!

At least, not when you think you have to do it all by yourself.

I stopped spending my energy trying to find time for what I thought I needed to get done and began to relax into what Papa was unfolding.

My mother-in-law, in particular, needed help.

She needed my wholehearted, focused help without distraction.
A change was needed in her living situation and she wasn't able to realize it on her own.

Last night I curled up in bed with such a deep sense of peace.

I felt cocooned in Papa's loving embrace.

Tomorrow Ray and I head home.

We will leave Mom settled in an assisted living setting with all the details that had been upsetting her taken care of.

My gym clothes will be repacked with confidence that they will shortly begin to be used once again.

And once I settle in at home my laptop and Bible will be opened up and, under the Holy Spirit's leading, will unite to bring that talk together!

I will need a full supply of sorts to do so and I am trusting the One who offers an endless supply of all I need!

It would have been so much easier if I had remembered one of my life verses.  It is First Thessalonians, chapter Five, verse thirteen.

"Faithful is He, who calls you, who also will do it!"

Another that comes to mind is found in Philippians Chapter Four, 

"And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus."
The whole Reynolds family can attest to that truth!

(I just viewed this posting and discovered the change in color of font half way down.  I have tried to correct it, but have had no success!)

No comments:

Post a Comment